One week later and the newspaper tabloids are still dishing up the dirt on all the unanswed questions Anna Nicole took to the grave with her. These are some things you may have seen or read about however, the majority of these items will wiggle their way into your living room very soon. I for one, had access to some of this stuff with my media pass. Now, without breaking any rules, I can merely shed a quick light on the controversy which hasn't even begun to spew smoke, let alone erupt like a dormant volcano.
- You may have seen Access Hollywood or one of those similar shows rush to Anna's vacant Hotel room in Florida to open up the fridge and take a look inside. Yes, it was slim pickin's as most of the food was spoiled. Inside were all kinds of pills from her much hyped deal with Trimspa. There was Vicadin, Oxycontin and methylamphedomenes. Several wrapped sandwiches were in there as well as a bottle of the grain alcohol Everclear. What they didn't immediately see, was the severed head of Anna Nicole on the top shelf (until they put things back in order, Anna's funeral has been put on hold). Here's something else you didn't know: Anna was staying at the Hollywood Florida Hilton Hotel. As a sidenote, Paris and Nikki Hilton had slept there several hours between 3 am and 7:30 am. Twenty minutes later the hotel cleaning woman attempted to enter Anna's room for a cleaning. After knocking and no answer, the maid used the pass key to enter only to discover a gruesome scene that had her on the next Grayhound bus back to Mexico. Did the Hilton sisters do it or, they just happened to be in the Florida area tat night? How about the maid? Scared of what she saw, or scared of getting caught?
- Next up, Anna's little dog "Sugarpie" is on the list for a DNA test. In the above photo taken only days before her death, Anna poses with her beloved baby who bears an uncanny resemblance to Sugarpie. Is it possible that Anna foresaw her own demise and had the semen of her doggie implanted inside her to crossbreed a human and animal? See for yourself as the little tyke appears to have a normal body however, the head of a dog.
- A few more contestants to go, and we'll have a panel to play "Hollywood Squares! No matter if you're a man or woman, young or old, white, black, or mexican...If you've been to Hollywood Florida, you might have woken up early in the morning in a strange Hotel room with Anna Nicole snoring louder than a 747 taking off the runway and her naked body on top of you. In the collage of four photos above, from upper left we have Zsa Zsa Gabor's swinging husband who claims to be a Prince, Duke, or whatever. The old fart was more than happy to brag to Zsa Zsa that he bagged Anna and that kid of hers belongs to HIM. Next up, Attorney Howard K. Stern who although still claims to be the Father, also admits to comply with Anna's wishes of underfeeding the child so she can be "Sexy". Stern also acted as Anna's "hook-up" when she was being bitchy and needed drugs. Even while pregnant, Anna pushed this guy out to the bad neighborhoods of Florida to purchase dope. Late last year, the two stopped short of getting married and instead, called it a "bonding ceramony". How about SIRRIUS radio's Howard Stern? His name gets tossed into the hat because Anna and the other Howard often appeared as guests on his radio show. DJ Howie would often get angry when the other Howard refused to allow Anna to be on the microphone alone. Like a defense Attorney in a big murder trial, Howard K. would coach Anna along and make sure she didn't make a fool of herself. When Stern the DJ had a run in with her lawyer and telling him he had no business taking part in Anna's conversation on the air, Anna and her Attorney stormed out only to leave DJ Stern high and dry for the final hour. In order to make sure he's not overshadowed by Anna's death and all the hoopla, DJ Howie proposed to his model/ girlfriend. Way to go Howie! Last but not least is excercise guru Richard Simmons. He may be as queer as the day is long however, years back worked with Anna "Sweat'n to the Oldies" and was reported by people in the class to be sporting a woody when close to Anna. ...Hey, draw your own conclusions. So, now what?
- Enough pussyfooting around. LET'S FIND THE FATHER! Yeah, it's easy to play armchair quarterback and decide what in the heck tarnation is going on. Why are so many people waiting in lines to take blood tests to prove they ARE the Father? Most guys head for the hills when they learn they are only one of a few men to have helped produce the baby. End this chapter RIGHT NOW and take the whole kit and kaboodle to Maury Povich! Yes, he's one tough Jew that can easily point out a playa and liar even before the test even starts. See how quick these guys climb over one another to get legal custody of the kid after they find out that Anna left her whole fortune to her son that died of a lethal mix of pills just last year while visiting Mom and baby in the hospital! You better believe more is to come on this topic!
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