Fastballs sometimes don't work out quite like you hoped. The same goes for "8 Balls". A few days ago, St. Louis Cardinals relief pitcher Josh Hancock was laying in a St. Louis Hotel room. Hours away from a game with the Cubs, Hancock was due at the stadium. After several "wake up" calls from the coaching staff and teammates, Hancock finally pulled his ass out of bed and drove 90 mph to Busch Stadium. Sadly, while tailgaiting a flatbed semi trailer that suddenly slammed on the braked, Hancock's 2007 Ford Explorer slid under the back end and sheared the roof off killing him instantly. Needless to say, the game scheduled for that day was postponed. So, what exactly happened with this church going individual who held baseball so close to his heart? Nobody seemed to know the answer, Afterall, the guy was in an accident due to oversleeping. It could happen to anyone/ Yesterday however, toxicology reports were released to shed some light on the subject. Seems that after an autopsy, Josh Hancock had twice the legal limit of alcohol in his system. Inside the truck, investigators found a glass crack pipe and a bag of marijuana with residue in the ashtray. Not only was he foolish for jumping on the expressway, he was actually going to possibly be on standby should Tony LaRussa need him on the mound. Kids look up to these guys as heroes and they go and pull stupid crap like this. Major League Baseball always crack down on steroids in the game...what about substance abuse? A player can obviously snort cocaine, smoke crack, and smoke dope while chasing it down with a six pack before taking to the field. God forbid steroids are taking all the heat. Too bad Josh Hancock never made it to Busch Stadium. He would have made a fool out of himself, or else it was a cry for help that nobody listened to or took seriously.
What in The hell is going on in Washington? We have a war in Iraq entering it's 5th year. George W. vetoed a bill that would put a timetable on the troops returning home. Now, in perfect synchronicity with Cinco De Mayo, Bush is turning his attention to those illegal immigrants from Mexico who think they are so special that they don't have to go through the process of filling out all the paperwork that goes along with being a U.S. citizen because they already have siblings living here. Bush wants to allow these people in because they are part of millions of people that "built this country". Maybe they built all the big cities in America however, at the end of the day they chose to go back to Mexico to pick lettuce. That ain't my fault. I suggest Washington critics propose a wall from California to Texas about 60 feet hugh. Make it electric too. Enter Republican Senator John McCain of Arizona who is all too familiar with immigrants. Unfortunately, this Presidential candidate's messages are lost within the circus of Democratic Presidential nominees Hillary Rodham Clinton and Borack Obhama. Here's what I suggest: President Bush doesn't want to end the war in Iraq and wants to keep the borders open for Mexicans to come and take our jobs and healthcare. If a Mexican should make it over the big fence I suggested and fall onto the Arizona desert, let's make him a U.S. citizen. FIRST, let's put Grande Hernandez on a waiting plane, give him an AK-47 and ship him off to Iraq. If he's alive two or three years later and comes back, we'll make him a U.S. citizen...Case closed!
