"Blogging about Blagojevich Bonanza!"

They call him, "Blah-Goy-Oh-Vich". He was damn proud to be Governor of Illinois and by golly, he still is! Nevermind the fact that being leader of "The Land of Lincoln" has always been notorious for corruption, lies, cheating and stealing... Nevermind the fact that those before him have gone from three piece suits to black and white stripes and pounding out metal vanity license plates, this time was going to be different, It was. All previous Governors before "Blago" had only ended up in the slammer for crooked politics before or after their role as Governor. "Blago" just added a new dimensio to how we define a person's character by breaking the law while still in office! It goes back to the day when the cordless phone went on the market. The nice salesman at Radio Shack warned me, "Be careful what you say on the telephone...someone might be listening". A lesson that has stuck with me to this day. Unfortunately, the soon-to-be jailbird found himself at the receiving end of what he thought to be a birthday hoax by "Punk'd" however, no Ashton Kutchner and no MTV. On Monday morning "Blago" answered the door in his pajamas only to find the FBI on his front stoop with arrest warrant in hand.

• The world's most expensive chair. You won't see this chair on PBS' "Antique Roadshow". "eBay", or for sale in "The Penny Saver". NO. It's not actually a chair like you see in the photo however, it's called a "seat". A "Senate Seat" to be exact. The last person to rest his cheeks on the seat was Sen. Borack Obama. If the rules to refill this vacancy were followed in accordance with the law, "Blago" would have awarded this spot to the candidate most worthy however, in an opportunity to make some quick cash, the seat would be discovered to come with a few stipulations including a pair of slacks with pockets that stretch to the ankle. The lucky candidate would have the responsibility of representing Illinois in Washington as well as putting groceries on "Blago's" table. While the Feds were listening in on the phone, he and his wife continued with their reckless behavior, salty language, and trying to oust the editorial staff of the Chicago Tribune using the sale of the Chicago Cubs as a pawn in the game. As of tonight, "Blago" is still in office however, the walls are closing in. He's yet to speak to the citizens of the state of Illinois
• The Numbers Game - Earlier this week, a shocked soon-to-be President Obama addressed the issue of the Governor in one of his daily press conferences. While not going into too much detail, Obama mentioned that he himself was involved in one of "Blago's" profanity laced rants caught on tape. Up until this week, the 1990's Robert DeNiro flick, "Casino" was listed in the Guiness Book as the only film to cram an average of 110 "f-Bombs" a minute in it's total running time of 132 minutes. In comparison, the "Blago" tapes contained as many "F-Bombs" within the realm of 8 minutes or, nearly 12 times as many "F-Bombs" contained within the debut recording of The Jerky Boys prank phone calls from 1995. That's a number that would even make a person like Tony Soprano cringe and feel ashamed of! Good for you, "BLAGO"!
• When "Blago" is ready to speak. I'll be there to ask the questions others are afraid to ask. I've been brushing up on my reporting skills this week. I'm no Geraldo Rivera by any means however, I'll pull out my faux "Press Pass" and show up in Chicago at the State of Illinois building ready to fire away. Here's some examples of what I will ask the fallen Governor:

1) When you get to jail, are they going to allow that cat you have on your head?

2) I'd go with the orange jumpsuit. The horizontal stripes make you look fat.

3) What will the new State slogan be? How anout, "The Black Eye State" or "The Land of Lyin', Cheatin' and Stealin'?"

4) Do you and your wife kiss your daughters goodnight with those dirty mouths?

5) You mean that you never got the postcard in the mail from AT&T about possible security issues with the phone lines in your neighborhood?

Let's face it, Santa Claus will still come around even in prison. A letter will be placed in the Governor's stocking that says, "Dear Rodney... I'm not gonna bother to even stick coal in your sock this year, hell, I'm given you the deed to the whole F***in' coalmine! Ho! Ho! Ho! You JACKASS!"