Planes, Trains, and Automobiles make for a sex filled Memorial Day weekend trip! Everyone is ;ooling ahead to next weekend. It's the official start of summer. A time for lazy days in the sun, sipping a cocktail or two, and barbequing weenies on the grill. Some people even enjoy getting out of town and taking a trip. With the skyrocketing cost for a gallon of gasoline, folks are grabbing their nickels and times and letting someone else do the driving. Counting out of state vehicle tags and cloud formations in the sky is just plain boring. Let's face it... YOU paid hard earned money to get away, so you'd better make getting to your final destination as fun as the place where you're going. Bothing better than some good SEX to kick things into high gear. These folks had the right idea.Jet Bluw Airways had an "incident" recently on a non-stop trip from L.A. to New York. An airline attendant with a sore back needed to sit down in one of the plane's comfy chairs however, the plane was packed solid with no open seats available. The stewardess ran right to the cockpit to explain the situation. In a flash, he jumped out of his seat to remedy the problem and singled out a male passenger whom he asked to kindly give up his seat. "No way!" the man cried out, to which the pilot answered, "get your ass over to the shitter and don''t move! We'll be landing in New York in three hours. Besides, I'm doing you a favor by taking your ass to New York... so go sit down or I'm gonna push you out the door!". The man finally moved and sat on the aluminum throne in the water closet until the plane landed. While he bitched and moaned to everyone while leaving the plane and promising a $2 Million dollar lawsuit against Jet Blue, what he failed to say was that somewhere over Ohio, the stewardess with the "bad back" joined him in the bathroom for some "thanks for giving up your seat for me" sex. Unfortunately, the lawsuit is still pending.It's rush hour on the rails in Germany when a bullet train gets stuck on the tracks. Informed that it will be awhile before help arrives, the engineer decides to literally take the matter into his own hands as he unzipped his pants and began to maasturbate. He was having a good time moaning and groaning and hooting and hollering up a storm until he was done. Exhausted, the engineer leaned back in his chair and breathed a sigh of relief as someone knocked on the door. It was a conducter on the train who was laughing hysterically. "What's so funny?" the engineer inquired, to which the conducter replied, "I think you left the intercom on! The whole train was laughing at you!". Needless to say, he spent the night on the train making a quick exit undercover of the darkness so he wouldn't be seen.Finally, the father of a 14 month old baby got tired of his girlfriend giving him the third degree over child support. It was a busy day, to which he agreed he'd watch the kid and make a stop at Kmart to buy some lunch and some diapers for the baby girl. His car never made it to the store. He got sidetracked by the blinking neon lights of strip bar signs on the way and pulled into a bar'd parking lot. Deciding the baby would be best if left in the car with the windows closed on a hot and humid evening, he ventured inside for a couple of beers. Aware that it was very late at night, the girlfriend immediately phones 911 to notify the cops that her baby was missing. Almost simultaneously to her phone call, the guy staggers out of the bar and sees half the police department surrounding his car. By this time, a passerny spotted the kid in the car and called the cops who came and got her out. He must gave had a good time in there because in his version of telling the story he was only in there for 10 minutes. In reality, it was two hours. It got worse from then on. Police discovered he entered the bar with a fake ID and was actually 17 years old. He'll have a long time to reflect on what he did as he rots away in prison. Nice, eh?
