Basic Math
(1) Sir Elton John + (1) Billy Corgan = (1) President of North Korea. Congratulations! You're off the United States' Most Wanted Terrorists Database!
October 11, 2008
"Ramblings About Nothing"
As this week comes to a close, I look back on the last seven days and reflect on what it was like to go out and do something I usually hate to do... go out in public and "mingle" with peope. I don't like it because unlike most people, I can't just go out and enjoy myself. My mind is always working and I usually return home at the end of the day trying to pull all my thoughts together. You know, this week was no different than the others however, the only thing was that this time a few of my stops included waiting rooms. OK, first things first was the eye doctor. I've visited with many doctors over time and I still can't understand why this guy is the one with the most paperwork to fill out! Good God! I just had a cornea implant a week ago meaning, my eye is still not all together. Not to mention the eye drops I placed in my eye going to see this guy. Tell me now, if I'm in his office, that means I can't see, correct? If I can't see, how am I able to read all the small print? This is how they take advantage of you. The small print says, "Your vision may be worse after your visit with the doctor" You can't see it, but you sign anyway because "Who really reads all that small print anyway?" No matter how bad he screws you up, at least he's covered legally. Meanwhile, you're screwed!
My next stop was at my family doctor the next morning. This guy always makes me fill out paperwork too! It doesn't make a difference if I were to see him today because if I come back tomorrow, I have to fill out the same paperwork all over again. I asked the lady at the desk, "What's going on? Are the computers down?" "No." She replied. "It's our new security policy. You'll have to do this every visit". Am I wrong, or is this new policy a little too late? Afterall, 9/11 was seven years ago. Unless I missed Bill O'Reilly one evening, a doctor needn't worry too much about someone coming in to play with the inventory. Here it is, seven years after the fact and no one is still for certain if that chemist that killed himself was the one who put Anthrax in the mail! Not only that, but if I have a nasty drug habit, my family physician is the last place I'd run to. The only "smack" this guy ever gave me was a "smack" on the ass when I was born. I hate to say it but, "security" is something I will refer to often in this post. As time has moved on from the 1960's to today, we've been trying like crazy to speed up the process of everything and making things simpler. As we began to worry about the ozone layer and global warming, paper was on it's way out and everything went on computer. All of a sudden, it seems we're going in reverse. Back to the old days where file cabinets were the norm. Hey, at least your ipod is helping you out for you. This computer nonsense in the real world is on it's way out. Here's another gripe about my doctor: While you wait for him to see you, he's got a brand new plasma television on the wall that's always tuned to Fox Business Channel and next to it is a sign that says, "Don't change the channel please". Is this a good thing? Did he not notice the sudden increase of blood pressure in his patients in October who must sit and watch all the bad things on Wall Street as you wait to see him? Typical of most doctors, mine also has a lot of old magazines laying around to keep you busy. As I was catching up on what's going on in Operation Desert Storm the other day from a 1990 Newsweek magazine, I thought it would be kind of funny to make up a couple of magazine covers on PhotoShop and staple them to some old magazines on my next visit. Instead of reading news from twenty years ago, a few clicks of the mouse will allow me to change the cover story and the date to twenty years into the future. The fun starts as soon as you sit back and take notice as people pick up a magazine and start glancing through. You thought the people at the Doctor are weird? How weird is it now that his office is in "The Twilight Zone"? He gives me a scrip and off I go to Walgreen's.
My next stop was at my family doctor the next morning. This guy always makes me fill out paperwork too! It doesn't make a difference if I were to see him today because if I come back tomorrow, I have to fill out the same paperwork all over again. I asked the lady at the desk, "What's going on? Are the computers down?" "No." She replied. "It's our new security policy. You'll have to do this every visit". Am I wrong, or is this new policy a little too late? Afterall, 9/11 was seven years ago. Unless I missed Bill O'Reilly one evening, a doctor needn't worry too much about someone coming in to play with the inventory. Here it is, seven years after the fact and no one is still for certain if that chemist that killed himself was the one who put Anthrax in the mail! Not only that, but if I have a nasty drug habit, my family physician is the last place I'd run to. The only "smack" this guy ever gave me was a "smack" on the ass when I was born. I hate to say it but, "security" is something I will refer to often in this post. As time has moved on from the 1960's to today, we've been trying like crazy to speed up the process of everything and making things simpler. As we began to worry about the ozone layer and global warming, paper was on it's way out and everything went on computer. All of a sudden, it seems we're going in reverse. Back to the old days where file cabinets were the norm. Hey, at least your ipod is helping you out for you. This computer nonsense in the real world is on it's way out. Here's another gripe about my doctor: While you wait for him to see you, he's got a brand new plasma television on the wall that's always tuned to Fox Business Channel and next to it is a sign that says, "Don't change the channel please". Is this a good thing? Did he not notice the sudden increase of blood pressure in his patients in October who must sit and watch all the bad things on Wall Street as you wait to see him? Typical of most doctors, mine also has a lot of old magazines laying around to keep you busy. As I was catching up on what's going on in Operation Desert Storm the other day from a 1990 Newsweek magazine, I thought it would be kind of funny to make up a couple of magazine covers on PhotoShop and staple them to some old magazines on my next visit. Instead of reading news from twenty years ago, a few clicks of the mouse will allow me to change the cover story and the date to twenty years into the future. The fun starts as soon as you sit back and take notice as people pick up a magazine and start glancing through. You thought the people at the Doctor are weird? How weird is it now that his office is in "The Twilight Zone"? He gives me a scrip and off I go to Walgreen's.
Upon returning home and opening the bottle of pills, I realize I was given the wrong thing by mistake and need to go back. I thought of a few other things I'd pick up as long as I'm going back there and here's where "security" springs into action again. I decide to get some AXE body soap. There are now two aisles of assorted scents to pick from. Needless to say, they are locked behind plexi-glass and I need an employee with a key to open the cabinet. Wouldn't you know it that I had the same luck when I spotted mouthwash and razor blades? Some of what I wanted only had floor samples and the real stuff was behind the counter at the pharmacy. All in all, it took about fifteen minutes to get only a few things because of "security". So, while at the pharmacy I tell the Pharmicist about the mix up with the pills. I hand her the open bag containing an open bottle of pills with all the seals broken, and she gladly takes it back without any problem, puts it back on the shelf and hands me the correct one. It's good to know that I can't taint a bottle of soap however, switching one pill with another is fine and dandy at least at Walgreen's.
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