Phillip The Pickled Christmas PigWith Special Guest: Dr. Drew Pinsky
“I found myself in the State of California lying flat on the steps of a medical building as a creaking door opened just above my fractured skull. “Hello old chum” the man at the door greeted me. “I see you’ve made it. My name is Dr. Drew Pinsky and I want to help you!” “He lifted me up and brushed me off as he inquired, “Now what’s this business about an apple and pineapple trying to get you?!” I started to respond however, was quickly cut off by the Doctor… “Wait!” he screamed. “Don’t say a word until you sign these release forms. The first one is to allow your footage to air on the MTV/Viacom Networks and the second one, that one takes all the liability off me personally and professionally should something go wrong.” I took hold of the paperwork and signed away not knowing what I may be getting myself into. "
I walked down a hallway and what did I see?
A room full of addicts and Gary Busey.
“I’m not a patient here but can I get you a drink?”
Dr. Drew rolled his eyes and said “that’s what you think!”
A room full of addicts and Gary Busey.
“I’m not a patient here but can I get you a drink?”
Dr. Drew rolled his eyes and said “that’s what you think!”
“There’s no drinking or drugging, you must follow the rules…”
then I felt someone’s cane poke and prod at my jewels...
It was Jeff Conway from Taxi, his voice gave me chills,
as he cursed me and swore I had taken his pills.
“My meds are all hidden and I want to go home!”
Then rolled away yelling “Please leave me alone!”
then I felt someone’s cane poke and prod at my jewels...
It was Jeff Conway from Taxi, his voice gave me chills,
as he cursed me and swore I had taken his pills.
“My meds are all hidden and I want to go home!”
Then rolled away yelling “Please leave me alone!”
I thought I saw Tawny Kittaen sitting there from afar
She once rolled half naked on the hood of a car!
“It was Whitesnake!” I said and she turned with a glee
“David Coverdale’s an ass” and one guy agreed.
It was the booted out drummer from the band Guns and Roses
Whose millions of dollars were snorted up noses.
She once rolled half naked on the hood of a car!
“It was Whitesnake!” I said and she turned with a glee
“David Coverdale’s an ass” and one guy agreed.
It was the booted out drummer from the band Guns and Roses
Whose millions of dollars were snorted up noses.
He stood up and staggered and pointed at me,
“F### Axl Rose and his Chinese Democracy”
Everyone was so angry and bitter to end,
Then it suddenly hit me, I’m rhyming again!
“F### Axl Rose and his Chinese Democracy”
Everyone was so angry and bitter to end,
Then it suddenly hit me, I’m rhyming again!
Drew gave me a slap and yelled “wake up you swine!”
“Doc, I don’t have a problem, it was only bad wine”
I had learned my lesson and ran towards the gate
“Doc, I don’t have a problem, it was only bad wine”
I had learned my lesson and ran towards the gate
When I woke up again I was on someone’s plate.
I was sprinkled with spices and someone yelled “BAM” It was Emeril Lagassee and I was his ham.
I looked to my left and then to my right
It was the apple and pineapple telling me “Bon Appettite”
The Moral of the story: Too much of a good thing isn’t always a good thing. Take life in moderation and have a safe holiday.
Gary Busey’s final thought: “What the F@&k was this crap??!!
I was sprinkled with spices and someone yelled “BAM” It was Emeril Lagassee and I was his ham.
I looked to my left and then to my right
It was the apple and pineapple telling me “Bon Appettite”
The Moral of the story: Too much of a good thing isn’t always a good thing. Take life in moderation and have a safe holiday.
Gary Busey’s final thought: “What the F@&k was this crap??!!
