Regis and Kelly: Sink or Swim? Here it is folks...while enjoying my morning bowl of Cookie Crisp cereal the other morning, I saw it! Regis and Kelly Live on the old WGN 22 incher and Regis made a remark that could have resulted in him ending up "swimming with the fish" side by side with Jimmy Hoffa. The only way that would have happened however, was if his Producer Gellman had it in him. Yiu ever see the beginning where they invite a viewer to call in and okay a game of trivia? Regis and Kelly converse a little small talk with the caller and then invite the person to spin Gellman's Big Spring Fling-A-Go-Go prize wheel to win a vacation if the answer the question correctly. Regis asks a stupid question like this: "Harrison Ford was a guest on our show yesterday and he's the star of the Indiana Jones sequel in movie theaters right now. Besides the role of Indiana Jones, what other character did he portray originally that put his name on the map?" Thirty seconds to get it right and Kelly's gonna keep time. You can only answer once. After the wheel gets Regis' big spin and the needle lands on a trip to Costa Rica, the caller chimes in with a guess. "Is it Han Solo from Star Wars?" and Regis answers, "Yessss! You're right! Now where did you say your from caller?" She responds, "I'm in Des Moines Iowa right now." "Oh geez!" says Regis. "Lots of water out there huh? All that flooding from the Mississippi River, I'll bet you're bailing out right now eh?" Caller says,"Yup, I lost everything and some things just can't be replaced like old photos and what not." "Good Lord" says Regis. "that's a shame! Our hearts go out the folks out there dealing with this mess. ANYWAY, Betty from Des Moines, you just won yourself a Disney Cruise to Costa Rica where you'll have ten days of white water rafting, scuba diving.! In other words, you'll be up to your neck in water for over a week. CONGRATULATIONS! This prize package is worth $21,000. ENJOY!" Miraculously the woman stayed on the line to collect her trip while I nearly choked on my cereal, and Regis didn't even flinch. Whatta great gift! It's like giving a homeless guy a doorbell. Moving on, in the "Us kids don't have anything to do this Summer" category, Some kids in the North 'burbs got a nifty idea for a money maker ti buy some X-Box games. When the parents asked what the boys were gonna do while they were at work, the kids kicked around the idea of a lemonade stand. Not a bad idea eh? Only thing is, Daddy must have left his text book from Bartender School as well as keys to the liquor cabinet where most irresponsinle people leave a loaded handgun: IN PLAIN SIGHT. The kids pulled out a few fifths of booze and mixed up a batch of electric lemonade for thirsty passerbys on the street. The mailman didn't say a word. Matter of fact, he laid a dollar on the card table and instructed the boys to keep filling up his Dixie cup. No one knows for sure but, someone called the cops and within minutes a few police cruisers swung by and sent the neighborhood into a frenzy discovering these youngsters were peddling mixed drinks. Of course, mom and dad got a call to come home early from work and pick up their kids from the station. This wasn't Sheriff Andy Taylor giving Opie a lecture about the bad thing je did, NOPE! These parents now face a hefty fine and perhaps jail time for "contributing to the delinquincy of minors" and "operating without a liquor license". The kids? They're at their new home that has the initials DCFS until this case is brought to trial. Here's a "bottom's up" to great parenting!!!
